She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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