i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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