If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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