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Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
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