dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
