How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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