whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
