my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
