Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I think people are normalizing furries
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
