How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I understand Curling. That high.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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