Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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