and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
