she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
