Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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