you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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