Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
