i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
