It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Still dying that you shit outside
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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