did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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