My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
