Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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