Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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