so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.