I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
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