just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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