it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
