I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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