Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
