There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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