when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
The power of my boobs compel you
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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