I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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