I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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