New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
