just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
