I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
