I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize