I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
you traded sex for a burrito?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
