Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
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