i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
