I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
