Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Randomize
