I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize