just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
