Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
