I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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