I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
