That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
