i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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