I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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