is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize